By: Lisa Davison
Recently I was singing a worship song and was struck by a short phrase: “I remember.” It was reflective (as remembering is) and I was suddenly caught up in thankful reflection for things God has done in my life. Things I haven’t thought about for a long time, maybe even years.
I used to be very broken, but He touched me with His love. I learned the healing power of forgiveness. It caused me to grow. Then peace came. And worship has been a very big part of that.
I can’t begin to truly explain the awesomeness of worship, but if you get it… then you know. It’s a beautiful place where time is transcended as heaven bows down to give the earth a kiss on the forehead. The earth resounds with singing and beauty and praise. It is my favorite thing.
I was made for it.
I remember living my life for myself before the days of grace. I like grace days better.
Sometimes, I take a glance back over my shoulder to remember where I came from. I see the long road I have traveled thus far and my heart nearly bursts with gratitude to a God who made me and sought me out and showed me a better way to live.
Even though I am older and supposedly wiser in life, I find myself from time to time focusing on what I want God to do for me rather than just focusing on God. It is a subtle notion, almost silent as it creeps into my heart. After all, my life belongs to Him as I gave it to Him many years ago. Just like any relationship that matures, expectation becomes part of it. I recall and relish the days of spending hours searching the Bible for new and deep truths. The tears. The prayers, the evidence of his presence… I remember the tenderness with which He found me and how He was never ashamed to love me.
I remember the granted desires of my heart in an amazing man to walk next to through this life and the beautiful daughters whose voices have filled my life with songs. Their confidence in me, their loyalty and their love are the things I treasure and my heart is overwhelmed at the goodness of God toward me.
How lovely are Your dwelling places, O Lord of hosts! My soul longed and even yearned for the courts of the Lord; My heart and flesh sing for joy to the living God. The bird also has found a house and the swallow a nest for herself, where she may lay her young, even your altars O Lord of hosts. My King and my God. How blessed are those who dwell in Your house! They are ever praising You! They go from strength to strength, Every one of them appears before God in Zion. O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer; Give ear, O God… Selah. Behold our shield O God, And look upon the face of Your anointed. For a day in Your courts is better than a thousand outside. I would rather stand at the threshold of the house of my God than dwell in the tents of wickedness. For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The Lord gives grace and glory. No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly. O Lord of hosts, how blessed is the man who trusts in You! (Psalm 84)
I fall down in repentance and worship Him. Again. Anew. I focus on Him, not on what He can do. I will not spend my life looking for the next thing. I will do this thing that I was made for: Worship.